Nothing Special

Hello all!
This part of the Whateverlution...is all about me. Call it an ongoing ever changing 'about the author' Dane Cook once said...A suicide note written by someone who is not suicidal is called an autobiography.

So what gives me the ability to speak out about the world? Why should anyone listen when I tell them about fitness, gaming, intellectual pursuits, the sociological ramifications of current world politics, and gummy worms?

Well that's something you're going to have to learn as you go. However if you want credentials, allow me to fill in a bit of my resume.

At 34 I have collected paychecks from over 30 different employers. I have built million dollar homes, I have driven a front end loader through mountains of trash, I've been to basic training and enjoyed some peace time national guard time, I've worked for restaurants, retail chains, and convenient stores and been a substitute teacher. However I have also spent over five years as a guard at a county jail AND 30 days as an inmate at a different county jail. (For CIVIL CONTEMPT-I couldn't afford to pay ALIMONY, and was subsequently put in jail, which caused me to lose my job with the Sheriff's Department)

My education involves an Associates degree, and 90 credits towards a BS in Mental Health and Human services, as well as a healthy interest in reference literature. School and I have never gotten along, I find it too rigid and constraining, I can learn more on my own.

The only things I know for sure...I've been pretty good at just about every job I've ever had. The closest to a job I actually liked was as a guard. I'm a people watcher and psychological dynamics fascinate me, plus I'm an adrenaline junkie and at the time thrived amidst the crazy fights, hangings, cut-ups etc etc. That being said I now have to pursue a different career, and this blog circle is part of it. It's a social and personal experiment. I know that everywhere I've gone, people tend to remember me. However despite being a quick learner, and intelligent and well-spoken, something seems to be holding me back. So I am now hoping to work from that into something here, maybe a job, maybe a career, maybe pocket money, time will tell.

Sunday, May 19, 2013

Sorting and categorizing some craziness



May 19th 2013.
There it is again.  That nagging Question…
Who am I?  Who have I become?
I am standing on a line between the right person, and who I know I am.
There are examples of people as far removed from the normal social and interpersonal mores’ as I am functioning…even thriving.  I however am also cursed with intense rationalism.  So I bounce between a detached, intensely passionate, whirlwind, of thoughts and ideas, and lunacy….
And a number crunching, precise, rational, planner.
In the middle I lose my mind and drift through the world hopelessly obscene.
Irreverent, intense, interesting, scary, trustworthy, and unreliable…
This lingering intrinsic dichotomy is pervasive to every part of my physical, mental and spiritual self…
I look at the blocks that make up my life, the successes, the failures, the ongoing careful planned juggling show, and I think to myself, how can I not tell this story…
Then I realize that people will read it…all of it…
I think to myself, how can I dare write this story.
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